Things to Do if You’re Bored

A book you can read: The Sound and the Fury

A movie you can see: Children of Men

A game you can play: Mega Man 2

An album you can listen to: OK Computer

A show you can watch: Breaking Bad

An activity you can partake in (with friends): Creating an annoying Youtube video

An activity you can partake in (without friends): Creating an annoying Youtube video

A food you can eat: Enchiladas

A drink you can make: Stim Pack

A skill you can learn: Playing the banjo

A skill you can learn (non-musical): Cooking stuffed bell peppers

A skill you can consider learning over fifteen times in your life and yet never accomplish: Juggling

A topic you can study: The Ottoman Empire

A concept you can ponder: If pain and sorrow were eliminated from the human experience, would life still be worth living?

A thing you can build: Birdhouse

A thing you can build (non-useless): Bookshelf

A word you can learn: Fatuous

A number you can count to: 393

A name you can try to pronounce: Krzysztof Kieslowski

A world record you can try to beat: Most watermelons headbutted in one minute (40)

A fashion trend you can adopt and regret ten years later: Skinny jeans

An item you can (and probably should) buy me: This thing

A Norwegian phrase you can translate: Pikk sjonglør

A random number you can call: (202) 615-9571

A fond memory you can contemplate: That one time at the lake

A comment you can make to someone if you want to receive a nostalgia-filled and slightly embarrassed chuckle in response: “Remember JNCOs?”

A fact you can realize: From the moment you were born there’s been an impossible amount of stuff for you to do, so if you’re “bored” you’re doing something wrong.

A concept you can ponder: If we were all forced to wear skinny jeans and JNCOs, would life still be worth living?

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About Christopher Haygood

Christopher Haygood is an incorrigible punk from the darkest sector of Nowheresville. He is a writer of novels, short stories, articles, screenplays, threats, and fake prescriptions for the unsuspecting elderly. He is not yet infamous.
This entry was posted in Miscellaneous Hatred and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Things to Do if You’re Bored

  1. marla diaz says:

    A book you can read: Walden

    A movie you can see: Eternal Sunshine

    A game you can play: Cosmo

    An album you can listen to:The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust

    A show you can watch: Queer as Folk

    An activity you can partake in (with friends): Running in the ocean butt naked screaming alanis morrissette lyrics

    An activity you can partake in (without friends): Running in the ocean butt naked screaming alanis morrissette lyrics

    A food you can eat: catnip

    A drink you can make: catnip tea

    A skill you can learn: playing the Didgeridoo

    A skill you can learn (non-musical): making raviolis

    A skill you can consider learning over fifteen times in your life and yet never accomplish: break dancing

    A topic you can study: transcendentalism

    A concept you can ponder: the true meanings behind all children nursery rymes and what the hell were we thinking reading those to our kids

    A thing you can build: a beach house

    A thing you can build (non-useless): a house for a needy family

    A word you can learn: colposinquanonia or floccinaucinihilipilification

    A number you can count to: 798

    A name you can try to pronounce: humuhumunukunukuapuaa

    A world record you can try to beat: the most times to have sex in one day

    A fashion trend you can adopt and regret ten years later: scruncies

    An item you can (and probably should) buy me: a puppy

    A Norwegian phrase you can translate: Jeg elsker deg

    A random number you can call: 867‒5309

    A fond memory you can contemplate: running in the ocean naked screaming alanis morrissette lyrics

    A comment you can make to someone if you want to receive a nostalgia-filled and slightly embarrassed chuckle in response: “Remember our 5th grade teacher?

    A fact you can realize: my life is a third done atleast

    • floccinaucinihilipilification: The act or habit of esteeming or describing something as worthless

      Well I don’t know what to think about that. I was thinking about buying you a puppy, too.

      Also hey. 🙂

      • marla diaz says:

        i thought that you might like that word, and hello there also
        and i would like a miniture snauzer and i want it grey or white and to name him mr rogers

    • You’ll have to settle for a three-legged Afghan Hound with mange. That’s the best I can do. Also, his name has to be Skinbite.

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